My guy and I have been together a long time and have our bases for trust down. We are thinking about opening our relationship to others and he is fine with diving in head first but I am not so sure.

I think it’s natural to be protective of your relationship hon.  One of the main differences between men and women is that men are better at living in the moment when it comes to sex.  Women will “what if” it and analyses to death before committing to something as big as involving other people.  The fantasy of open sex or threesomes are all about pleasure and new experiences….they’re fun and HOT!  The reality is you are exposing your relationship to risk.  We are all human and we aren’t always able to control our thoughts and feelings or predict how things will unfold.  It’s wise to be aware of those things rather than jumping in blindly.  The other issue…and this is one I struggle with…is as woman I need an intimate connection with someone before I interact with them sexually. Whereas men in general are a lot better at casual sex.  What if my intimate connection with someone developed into something more serious?  These are things that should be considered.  I recommend that you talk in more detail with your guy about what specific fears you have about opening up your relationship. Set up boundaries that you both agree to follow…these are important to ensure that you will be comfortable with the interactions your partner will have with others and vice versa.  If you decide to try it then do it on the basis that you are going to talk about what it was like for each of you, how it made you feel and any negative feelings that arise.  Lots of couples make it work and others are not successful…at the end of the day it’s just sex and not as important as your relationship.  Good luck darling! :) xoxoxo  

 


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